Wednesday, 13 July 2011

My Dislikable XI - Number 12 (Ashley Hurst)

In another fan selected XI , it is a pleasure to welcome a fellow Blade, Ashley Hurst, to A United View. He went his first match when he was 5 and had a season ticket for 20 years, since he was 8. Although Ash moved away from Sheffield at 17, when he joined the RAF, he still endeavoured to return every weekend possible to watch his beloved Blades and continues to do so now whilst residing in Lincoln.

He plays for and is assistant manager of @interbladesfc, which is a supporters club team founded in 2001. You can also follow Ash on twitter at @ashsufc1889

Generally my hate disliking of footballers normally revolves around there off field actions. Players like Joey Barton, Ashley Cole, Steven Gerrard etc. are far too easy to list there antics are world renowned and not really worth giving them the attention anymore.

On this list I’m going to try to concentrate on the onfield actions of certain players. We all know them, the dirty gits, the career thieves and the just downright useless…but my heart may have ruled my head with a couple on here…

Goalkeeper Jens Lehmann

Mardy, whinging, dirty, cocky and arrogant, are just a few words to describe this so called footballer. Claiming that a fellow team mate is “out of his class” exemplifies those traits. He’s stamped on players, thrown water at officials and always had something to moan to the ref about. Throughout his career he’s made some monumental saves, but he has also made some all mighty balls ups…

Right Back Gary Neville

Quite simply put; a career thief. How this just about average footballer managed to carve such a long and illustrious career is unbelievable. He was never the best in the world, or even anywhere near the top 100. He was never talented, just average at best.

Also the whinging and attitude of the player was disgusting. Always the first to start the Man U cloak around the referee, and always the last leave it alone, mostly unscathed.

Left Back Ryan France

What a god awful excuse of a footballer ;-) One of the most awful players ever to pull on the red and white shirt of the mighty Blades. No ball control, no passing ability, can’t tackle, jump, head, or kick…Pathetic.

Centre Back Kevin Muscat

One of the beautiful games so called “hard men.” When in reality he was just a downright dirty player and a thug. Many times has his rash, late, professional fouls erupted into violence with fists being thrown, just for him to walk away laughing afterwards…He never liked it if it happened to him.

Centre Back John Terry

The “new Bobby Moore”…Funny that, I didn’t see Bobby Moore crying is eyes out after World Cup 1970. Not like this pansy was after losing in the Champions League Final in Moscow. Not only that, he’s amazingly overrated. I don’t reckon much the Rio, but he’s far better than JT.

Oh…and he’s a dirty cheating toe rag too.

Central Midfield Jody Morris

Another average player is still managing to fraudulently earn money as a footballer. The little ankle biter that started at Chelsea, then Leeds, Rotherham, Millwall and now at St. Johnstone has managed to convince people that he is a Defensive Midfielder, when in fact he’s just a fit lad that runs around a field.

Added to this abusing American Tourists after 9/11, drunken brawls, sex offences and drink driving simply make this “man” a vile rotten ……………… My moment to refrain from swearing.

Central Midfield Carton Palmer

This is nothing to do with him playing for the other team in Sheffield. This is about is inability to play football (Are you seeing a pattern here?). He was described as "abrasive, awkward and argumentative" but on the pitch he was "determined, hard-working and persistent" by Dave Jones, the then Southampton manager. The latter three comments are what I think, but add to that no football ability and you got the perfect description for Carlton Palmer. Someone that can only run around for 90 minutes is NOT a footballer.

Central Midfield Vinnie Jones

Known as one of footballs “Hard Men” and now has the same tag in Hollywood. Anyone remember the “Soccer’s Hard Men” video, a video that encouraged wannabe players to be dirty. All Jones had in his arsenal was the ability to kick opposing players rather than the ball. Footballers are supposed to be role models, yet this tw@t got himself in the limelight big style…Now this thug is a Hollywood star which just makes it all even worse.

Centre Forward Ade Akinbyi

A striker that can’t score goals………is not a striker, or in this case, not even a footballer. He will be remembered by many Blades fans for “that goal” against Wednesday, but to the rest of us he was a waste of money, space and oxygen!

Centre Forward Jason Lee

“He’s got a pineapple on his head!!”

How have people not sussed this one out yet?!?!? Nineteen different clubs and he’s still getting paid to play (and even now manage). For a striker his goal scoring record is poor at best, even in the lower leagues he doesn’t manage to hit the back of the net much…Just bloody useless!

Centre Forward John Fashanu

AWOOGA…Yeah, does that piss you off too?? Fash is quite simply on my list for the Gary Mabbutt incident. Most of his career spent as part of the infamous Wimbledon Crazy gang, an era of football that bred tw@ts like him (Jones, Wise etc..). An average player, with one hell of a dirty streak.

Manager Bryan Robson

Well, being a manager is a hard task for anyone. Each manager has his own qualities. Some can get a squad together with little or no money. Some can get a team playing the (almost) perfect game. But this choice is made simply due to his sheer arrogance.

Step up Bryan Robson.......Awesome player, don't get me wrong, but as a manager it's a totally different story. At The Blades, his build up play was...well...erm...virtually non-existent. It seemed like an age to get the ball up the pitch, and then when it got there the players didn't know what to do with it. They had no passion, fight or belief. It was almost like they didn't want to be on that pitch. Just like Mr Robson himself I suppose, stood by the dug out.

He was given some money and made a couple of very excitable signings, but also with wage bills to suit.......and he did naff all with them.

Previous XIs

No. 1 - A United View
No. 3 - 9-Men
No. 4 - William Abbs
No. 5 - Goaltastic
No. 6 - Football Charlie
No. 7 - Phil Lupton
No. 8 - Lee Doane
No. 9 - Leazes Terrace
No. 10 - Gib Football Show
No. 11 - The Exiled Robin

Up next:

No. 13 Shakefon (Dave Stevens)

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